Life

Life has to go on does'nt it?
Or does it?

Really dont know what to do without you, today i seem souless and empty. Everyone is asking me whether am i alright. I'm far from alright, in fact i dont seem to see alright in my life anymore.

Enough about me, now onto you.

I know it has been hard on you these few days coping with your illnesses and our problems. I heard that your sickness is gone. Spoke with your brother a little while back and found that you went out. At least you're doing much better than me, all alone cooped up at home aimlessly. Hope that after this incident, he can start treating you well and not take you for granted. Shower her with all your love and care, Eric. I'm counting on you.

Finally i felt the pain you had one year ago and now its my turn.
Finally i'm crying as i type all these out of my heart.

I'm still waiting for your return whether you want it or not.
I'm always by your side, always caring for you.

Yes i know you heard it alot of times now and this is how i felt
when you spammed me with all your sorries.

If you can sacrifice leaving me for my own good, there's no
reason i cannot sacrifice my entire life just waiting for you.

I hope you understand that.

11.10PM

''okay tell me now, honestly, do you still like me or do you like him?''

''him''

Officially dead.
Thanks for all the lies you've gave me.
Just wanted to know why did you lie to me.
Some where in the future, if you have any problems, feel free to come back to me.

(P.S. I hate you for all the things you've done to me)

Untitled.

Its that dagger i see infront of my heart again. It has already pierced into my skin and exposed my blood to the oxygen outside of my body. But this dagger is no ordinary dagger, its a dagger that you gave me. Out of so many people i might think of giving me a dagger, it was you. The pain is beyond any words that can be used in this scenario. I guess if you really put the blade in more, i wont have the strength and determination to pull it out of my heart anymore.

I'm not asking for your pitiness in this post, i just hope that you will make the right choice and not ending up hurting yourself again and again. This is just a post about how i feel in my heart now.

Foolishly Childish.

I dont even know why am i blogging about you. I can say i dont know much about you, however for the things you have done today had utterly killed off the respect and pity i have for you. Why do u have to impersonate someone to talk to me? Why cant you just talk face to face with me? Why do u want to find out the truth so badly to even hurt the one you loved. You broke her heart so many times and yet asked her to forgive her every single time she wanted to leave you. Dont you personally think it is unfair to her own decision? Do you ever care for her feelings or just wanted to have a relationship with her so that others may think highly of you? Which guy would never ask his girl out for a movie after so long in a relationship? Yes i am pointing my crosshair dead centered at you, ET. If you want me to continue down the list, i can type whole day but i am disgusted by your childishness.

By hurting her, you did not just broke her heart but you made my day a living hell too do you realise that? You asked her to tell me to stop making things into a battle. Well just in case you are 'blur' again, i am not going to give up her and i will never give her up, nothing will make me give up her not even if i die. Yes as long as i am still breathing she will always be the one i loved dearly. So 'stop making things into a battle?' the battle has already begun since i returned to her life.

2010!

2010 is here! That means mid term break is gonna be over! =( sighh
this 2 weeks fly past faster then i thought. Just came back from my trip a few days ago but i'm to lazy to update u guys about the trip. Maybe when i'm free then i'll upload pics up. =.= dam blardee alot of pics.

The Moon

You say the moon links us together when we're far apart. This time i'm going to go even further without you. I wish i can take you along to where i'm going, i really do. Because without you, a holiday is never complete, without you my heart is always empty and without you, i'm always worried about you and your safety. So when i'm away i will always look up at the moon to be sure you are safe and sound, happily doing your own things. This holiday will pass slowly and time will seem to crawl into the darkness of history. A history of 2 weeks without you. I'm sad and worried about you my dear. So whenever you are feeling down or upset, please look up the moon like we used to do on that two faithful nights. Remember how we used to embrace each other when we looked upon the graceful and magnificent moon. Its a funny thing how an object or in this case a round piece of rock in space can be our symbol of love and care. I'll will continue to miss you until 10 days later when i'm back online. No one can replace you in my heart and i certainly hope that no one can replace me in your beautiful and kind heart. I love you. xoxo.

Thank You.

Thanks for wad you've done for me these past few days. Keeping me awake and
pei-ing me while i did my assignments. You also finished yours before ur hols.
Not bad wor...so ... ... hardworking. haha. Well pei me oso nid to have a limit de.
Pei till fishing liao bad for health lehh.. Well, take good care of yourself when i'm
gone. Dun slp so late till red dots appear on ur face. I'll be missing you the whole
time of my holiday trip. =x I'd rather stay with you if there's a choice..
Talking about choices, i would rather give up anything in the world to have you.

Strange Dream

Woke up from a strange dream today. A very very weird and eerie dream.
Its not like frightening or scary. Just pure weirdness.

Its afternoon and i'm walking home. Usual route home. But when i looked up at the sky,
instead of the sky, i saw somthing like another world above the clouds. I remembered
clearly, the view was like from an airplane, and u looked out thru the window down onto
a city, but much more nearer. Maybe like a few km away from where i'm standing.
I remember i can even see the roads and the vehicles moving on that 'world'. Its damn
eerie yet just struck me in the mind that it was so magnificent. My heart was pounding
from the sight of it. It is very very very weird. Why do i have a dream like this? i continued
to stare at it and the next thing in my dream i outside my house still staring at the distant
'world'. Will this dream be a reality someday? I just find it eerie and awe inspiring at the same
time.

They are almost back...!

Yes!! They are coming back with their new album soon. Cant wait for it!!

My Chemical Romance will grace January's issue of Alternative Press with the most anticipated album of 2010. Each band member will have their own cover, and subscribers to the magazine will receive a special edition with all 5 members. Check out the cover with all 5 of them, and then check out the covers for Gerard, Ray, Frank, Mikey and Bob.

Forever in my heart..

When I Miss You, I Dont Have To Go Far...
I Just Have To Look Inside My Heart.
Because That's Where I'll Find You.

New Moon

Familiar?

Its hard to get this 2 rings to reunite wor..
=x surprised that i still kept it?

Well, it took me dam long to took this pic and upload it into my blog. -.- Watched New Moon today during my 4 hours break. Quite a nice movie but lacked of fight scenes. Like it when jacob transforms.

Its so funny to see how the 3 main characters are so similiarly portrayed with the 3 of us. =\ Really thinking alot through the movie.

Anyway its up to you how do u wanna substitute the 2 guys in yourself. Kinda hard too. In the end you'll just have to hurt either one of us.

Just crossing my fingers tight for the time being now.
Hope to hear from you soon.

<3

Here without you.

How do I,
Get through one night without you?
If I had to live without you,
I would rather die than stay here.
Oh, I
I need you in my arms, need you to hold,
You're my only, my love, my every means to live.
If you ever leave,
Baby i would find you somehow even if it takes my life away.

And tell me now
How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Without you,
There'd be no smile on my face,
There would be no love in my life,
The world would mean nothing to me.
And I,
Baby I don't know what I would do,
I'd be lost if I lost you,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything in my life,

And tell me now,
How should I live without you?
I want to know,
Can I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

Please tell me baby,
How must we go on?

If you ever leave,
Baby you would cast me away, alone.
I need you with me,
Baby don't you know that you're everything?
You're everything that counts in my life.

And tell me now,
How do I live without you,
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?

How do I live without you?
How do I live without you baby?

Just dont let go any more.
I really missed you since our last parting.
Hope to see you soon, be good till then.
We'll carry on until the end.
No one will ever, ever break us up.

Now may i just have your hand?

Time for Miracles.

Been through one week of assignment rush..feels so beat now, yet i'm still up here blogging at this timing. =\ Finally got a temporary piece of heaven. Let loose for a couple of days and back to storyboarding assignment le. Just catched "2012" the 2nd time with my family. I really liked how the story unfolds and how it reflects upon us mankind. We tend to be self-centered in these times of crisis that we forgot about helping others who are in need. Some of the scenes are really touching. Aint gonna spoil the movie here. Go watch it, 8.50bucks for this movie is really damn worth it. But the ending kinda sucked. C'mon its supposed to be 2012 - the END of the world. Shall'nt say more. go watch it. =) overall a 4/5.

Exactly 1 week later, i will be more relaxed than now. I'm gonna surprise a few people that i havent seen for quite some time now. I hope it wont fall apart. But yea, if u are reading this - my plan already failed. haha. but i doubt u will see this. Okay off to slp.

Time for Miracles.

Sui Dao - Freya Lin

時間一分一秒 心情像白雲 自在的飄
獨自坐在公園一角 任憑風衝進懷抱
十二點的鐘聲 傳遍了城市每條街道
期待擁抱 又害怕會被你知道

到底是要遠遠看你 還是靠近一點更好
我不確定 你是不是 我一直要找的主角
我用騙人的祈禱 騙自己我現在很好
和你在一起的每分每秒 就像走過 彩虹隧道

時間一分一秒 同一座城市相互尋找
獨自坐在公園一角 看著雨後的青草
十二點的鐘聲 傳遍了城市每條街道
有誰知道 我現在矛盾的心跳

到底是要遠遠看你 還是靠近一點更好
我不確定 你是不是 我一直要找的主角
我用騙人的祈禱 騙自己我已經看到
忐忑不安的背後是微笑 是我們的 彩虹隧道

幻想不停圍繞 它很美也很煎熬
我卻無法選擇 要或不要

到底是要遠遠看你 還是靠近一點更好
我不確定 你是不是 我夢中見過的主角
我用騙人的祈禱 騙自己你沒有看到
陽光底下我的心像羽毛 跟你飛過 彩虹隧道

Down.

Its all going down.
Mood is going down.

Grades are going down.
Basketballing is going down.
Fellowship with friends are going down.

How are you doing
I wonder.

Why must i still think about you,
even when i know you may not do the same about me.

Saw you today alone in the library rushing your work.
I felt bad not being there the night before having to rush you to do your work.
I felt bad not no even lay my eyes on you although i really wanted to talk to you.

Even when i settle down on my seat, i had the temptation to message you.
Asking you about your work and how was you coping with all the workload.
I know you are vexed with all the given assignments but hang in there, jia you.

Well, not only you, i didnt do quite well for my recent few assignments.
Kinda screwed them up just because i wasnt in the mood to do them. Used to it by now.

I know i shouldn't be talking about this again.
But i just couldn't help it.
I hope i can just isolate and banish this feeling into the deepest corners in my heart.
But it just doesn't work this way.

I'm tired, very very tired.
But what's weird is no matter how very tired i am, i still think of you.



Just wondering do you in anyway ever feel this way?

Say Goodbye.

All that is said were just said.
All left undone.
All left.
Left to seek other joys.
Left with me.
All alone.

Found out that using short phrases pact more meaning.
Maybe its just me.
Since i'm always thinking about useless stuffs.
That aint gonna happen.
Or might happen.
Now i just dont care.
Look at me how you guys want.
I'm just me so dont discuss me.

Wanna go just go, dont worry about me.
I'll be where u all know i'll be.
You can find me there.
Stop asking me along.
Unless u guys wanna tag along.
No this are not lyrics.

So say goodbye to all the vows WE took.
Say goodbye to all the times WE had.
And say goodbye to the heart YOU break.

The Blood Rose.

.The Blood Rose.
-----------------------------------------------
Now its shattered.
Its so pain having to go through
the agony of waiting for the one.
Yet what's in store
was a dagger right though the heart.

It shatters
It bleeds
The dagger i'm holding,
a token for waiting.
You've asked for me to wait
and i kept on waiting.
Till the day it seems to end.

I ain't gonna cry.
Ain't gonna be mad.
All i wanted
is to know why.
Such a spendid knot
ended in a mess.

You ask me to focus.
Do you think its possible
With all the impossible
thoughts in my mind?

Just one drop of hope.
Yet all i get
is a drop of blood.

A drop of blood
it kills the bond.

It shatters
It bleeds
The dagger i'm holding,
a token for waiting.
You've asked for me to wait
and i kept on waiting.
Till the day it seems to end.

Now what's left
Is a Blood Rose
with sad sorrows.

A feeling i cant describe.

Its like numbing your whole heart and having a dagger stabbing right back at the same pathetic spot, where it is at its weakest. You see blood splattering out in every direction, your hands slippery with all the stains but somehow still gripping the handle of the dagger. You dont feel the pain. Numb with sorrow and neverendingness. Yet in the end, you are still stabbing yourself, even when you know you're already helplessly dead. That's how i feel. Emo? No...more like sorrow. How long i'm i supposed to wait? it cant be a day. cant be a week. not even a month. Maybe a year? 3 years? Can i have at least a single drop of hint for a single drop of hope. You've asked me not to give up. You are the ONLY one to ask me play back my bball. You are the one giving me hope. So now can you give me just one hope to make my wait end? Either good or bad. I wanna know. End my sorrow...just to either give me more sorrow or to shower me with endless smiles infront of my handphone, my computer or infront of your face.

Argh!

I thought i would forget you somehow. But the min i stepped into the lecture hall, i saw you. And thoughout the lecture, my eyes kept shifting my focus from the lecture to you. I just dont know why but that is wad happened. My mind was in a blank. Total blank. I might look happy but that's only the exterior of my shell. I just wanna say - I missed you very much since the time we last chatted. I've decided to wait on.

Shopping Shopping!

Went Peninsular Plaza with my frens this aftnn, bought a new bag and a skinny! haha. The bag was for only 14 bucks? i bet i'm visiting PP for almost once per month from now on. After that we went to Esplanade to chill and jam. Before we knew it, it was 10+ =.=